More From the Trenches of Online Dating

Yesterday found me on my most pointless date so far.  And I've gone out with a douche in a fedora who yelled at the waitstaff and a guy who stared at my tits for 45 minutes and said, "I can get away with it. I'm autistic."

The guy today was smart, attractive, and sarcastic.  On paper, a total catch.  He'd just come from dropping his kid off at an event so there was a lot of talk about the kidlet.  Fine, whatever.  But he never stops talking or asks me any questions, luckily his ranting is hilarious so I pretend I'm just interviewing a recluse from Scappoose for the duration of a drink.  

Exactly an hour later he waves down the waitress for the check and is in a rush to get outside. It's time to go pick up the kid. And off he goes after a very stiff hug and no niceties about getting together again.

It wasnt even a date; I had been his entertainment while his kid was on a play date.  Sigh. And they say romance is dead.

In other dating news this week, my therapist prescribed me a profile on Tinder.  Saying, "Its got to be better than however you're meeting men now."  So there's that.  And surprise, surprise the hot musician from last week never contacted me for a second date after telling me he respected me too much to sleep with me on the first date.  Are we only sleeping with people we don't respect now?

Happily the lovely man I enjoy regularly sharing company and oxytocin with has returned from the vast wintery wastelands of the middle of the country.  We had a good frolic that included dinner, rope and a lot of me whispering "oh fuck" into his shoulder.   So Okcupid at least got that match right.  Yum.  Hopefully it was a fitting welcome home for him.



Emily BinghamComment